Day 82 - Self-Will

Day 82 - Self Will

Recently I wrote on the Spark of Life this is a very important blog to understand who we really are, each one of us

Over time in this process, walking the self forgiveness, removing all our bullshit programming, and re-creating ourselves from scratch to always and in all ways to LIVE for real, to live what is best for all. That is real living... and AS going through this process there is something extremely peculiar that happens...

Because we have accepted/allowed ourselves to be run by energy for so long, we start to forgive this energy. For example for me it was stress. I used to RUN off stress. The stress of not having enough money. The stress of fearing failure and having my status 'drop' in the eyes of the system. The stress of deadlines. This had become me. I had accepted and allowed my spark of life to be converted into a burning-out of myself into this stress character.

Then over time I learned to let it go. To actually live in awareness, not needing to go into the stress patterns.

And what was so peculiar about this, was then I became depressed LOL (I can say LOL now because its funny, but going through it felt like hell)

I was no longer running off the fuel/energy of stress. I fell into a pit of depression where I didn't want to do anything.

What actually happened though was my being within me was now getting born. I had weak ass muscles.

Like when Neo wakes up in the matrix, he is feeble, he even pukes. Then over time though.... he finds himself for real.

This journey is self-will. I will write more self-forgiveness on it tomorrow. But this is a vital point to understand as I had to walk this for myself but it helped to have the context as I went through it. I had cross-reference support from people in our community and specifically in the Self-Perfected group because self-perfection requires walking through the change in totality. Going through the eye of the needle

So each one will need to define SELF WILL for themselves, and to establish 'wins' along the way, as a source of strength and a reminder that you can indeed 'get your feet under you' and walk for real.

We are so conditioned to get our 'power' from our success in the system, or from certain emotional characters we identify with.

But real power comes from self-responsibility, developed through self-will breath by breath.

More to come

Day 81 - Two Choices in Every Moment

Day 81 - Two Choices in Every Moment

Read the Self-Forgiveness out loud

There are two choices in every moment - self honesty or self dishonesty

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to hide from self honesty

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to believe I don't know what self honesty is 

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to blame my upbringing for not teaching me what self-honesty was

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not discern between honesty in the system and self-honesty where for example - being 'honest' in the system is getting a good job, going and working for a company like Raytheon to build bombs that are used in war, but I was a 'good boy' and was honest in the system because "I need a job and I'm a good patriot for America" for example. Meanwhile the self-honesty of realizing that one is participating in a system of war that will have consequence... This point is essential to understand

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not realize that self-dishonesty always creates a consequence, where self-honesty removes consequence

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not realize that self-honesty is found through self-forgiveness writing and the self-realization that comes from effective self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I have 'free choice' to choose whatever I want, but I am not free of the consequence

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fall in moments of automated mind consciousness playouts where a thought comes up, I accept it, and later on I realize I accepted/allowed an entire runaway train of consciousness thus self-dishonesty and consequence

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to live the word grateful in the realization that I am grateful to be aware of self-honesty and the self-responsibility of living this to the fullest extent I can, as the more we live in self-honesty, each as individuals, working together, the faster we sort out our world

I realize that self honesty is developed 

I realize that self honesty is the awareness of the good, the bad and the ugly within, where I alone am responsible for what I accept and allow, and that I can change that which I no longer accept and allow

I realize that in each moment, each breath I can either live in self honesty or self dishonesty

I realize that the more self honesty I accumulate the better my life is, even if initially it is uncomfortable, it allows the way through to emerge

I realize that the only way 'out' of this predicament we find ourselves in as humanity - the only way out is through, as self-honesty is the guide

I commit myself to brutal self honesty through every moment of breath, and if I fall or notice the slip into self-dishonesty,  I commit myself to drop the judgments, drop any blame, and get back to self-honest best for all actions, moment by moment so I can live and stand in a point of purity so no matter where I am in my life, in the world, that no weakness in me can be exploited, because over the next 7-14 years every last point of weakness within me can and will be removed, thus I stand here as all as equal as one pushing the cutting edge of this process. The only way I can stand and continue to grow and expand my influence is through self-honesty within, and facing every last point in my life

Day 80 - The New World

Day 80 - The New World

I saw this reel (linked below) and its the perfect way to introduce this: 

https://www.instagram.com/reel/DSJRfC2jNIR/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link&igsh=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ==

The old world that our parents had is no more.

The 'bones' of it are still left, but there's a parasitical money system living on top of it, without = money system and within = our egos that do everything for profit/money/energy

But this is a case of the parasite eating the host

What we need is a new vision of what's possible, and how each of us as humans can relate to the world

If you've been reading my blog from day 1 this is what I write about, done through the lens of self-honest self-forgiveness and self-responsibility

We are either going to choose the new world to be one where we take full responsibility and thrive

Or we are going to allow a new world with more and more consequence playouts

By new world I don't mean going to mars. I mean a new WAY of living here in our world. And it starts with new words, that create the new world.

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not realize the context of when I was born, the consequential outflows of the world and how that would affect my life

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to believe that its possible to 'ignore' the state of the world and just focus on myself and my own survival, while that may be a temporary possibility, the fact remains that world events like terrorist attacks and financial crises have an effect on each person, through limiting the opportunities available and affecting how the social contract operates

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed fear of news events, seeing the news as the authority of what's happening in the world

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to react to the fear of news events by flipping to the opposite polarity - ignore the news - as though this somehow will help. 

I realize that having a well rounded view of the world, filtering the world and current events through the principle oneness and equality as what is best for all as common sense - this is the only way to make sense of the world and thus my place within the world

I realize that my generation of Millennials and Gen Z were born into the collapse of the old system, and there is a ripe opportunity to unite the masses, starting with grass roots, to bring about a new way through

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not realize the vocabulary to understand the context of how the world works, as it had become a energy-generating machine where we use and abuse everything that is alive, and convert it into temporary energy. We extract minerals and fuel from the earth. We take new babies and put them in the daycare to school indoctrination system. We take real talent and bastardize it through hollywood and the media, all for a temporary energy experience. Yet this can stop with ME and how I act

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the New World we can create involves a parasite cleanse, starting with my own parasitical ways of thinking where 'I just want to win' at the expense of others. Not realizing that the giving and sharing of life, honoring others in the way I would like to be honored - this is the new social contract that acts as the immune system of earth, where we can create the coordinated effort to show its more advantageous, its actually best for all, to work together and create as one

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to hear the phrase 'change the system' and go into a reaction of 'fuck the system' for all the atrocities that have been done in the name of the system, yet we ARE the system, so its not a 'fuck this' its a forgiveness that is needed

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not realize that its about taking responsibility for the system within me, writing every single day, taking responsibility every day, not swinging into polarities rather finding the best for all equilibrium and balance 

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the way the new world comes about is new words - through education - through the placement of words and how I live. For example will I live the word CARE, will I live the word AUTHORITY will I live the word TEAM? All of these words can be redefined, so that unconsciously I am resonating the updated 'new world' definitions instead of the old.

I commit myself to show I care - through taking the time every day to consistently show up and treat others as I would like to be treated, to nudge others to walk forward and discover their utmost potential

I commit myself to live the word authority - as freedom from doubt, the belief in myself and my abilities. Not looking outside of myself an answer, rather understanding the world and applying the principles to discern what is actually best here, and trusting myself to make it happen - make it realized

I commit myself to live the definition that TEAM = Together Each Attain More, and to really put this to the test. I have seen when we work as a group, there is so much more possible, more leverage, more power, and as we create the new world this is necessary we work together for real and consider each other.

Day 79 - One Point at a Time (How Reality Works)

Day 79 - One Point at a Time (How Reality Works)

Note - read the self forgiveness out loud

We can get worked up in our minds with many points to face

Especially if you were bold enough to make the 'life list' yesterday

Here is the point:

Reality is physical, it works with 1+1 moment by moment, one point at a time

If we try and do multiple things at once, this introduces stress, friction etc.

So its a skill to be here, be present, its very simple

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not realize that as a child I naturally did things from a state of presence, one thing at a time, I didn't have a mind that could dart around from point to point operating at quantum speed, I was present and HERE, and at some point I changed and my innocence of expression was converted into a corrupt mind, that I am now here walking through

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to find motivation and energy from feeling 'busy' in my mind with all of the 'things I gotta do'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize the power in putting 'pen to paper' (physically or digitally) and to sit down and get all the things out of my mind, 1 point at a time - this is powerful because its me as life directing myself, placing into WORDS what is within me, and thus I can process the information into an effective step by step plan to not have to overthink it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe its too stressful to write down a list and thus I react to the process of processing the information in my head into living words, within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to miss the fact that if I don't actively work on processing the information into living words - that I hold myself back and in a state of consequence and time looping, yet WHEN I do this effectively I am freed up able to move through life with ease

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not realize the moments from childhood and teenage years where I was imprinted by the system with the chaos program of 'here is what a 'good system slave' does' and in those moments I missed them, and then accepted and allowed the stress of the system to scramble me from a innocent expressive human being into a system slave, worried about my grades, 'fitting in' and all sorts of mental bullshit just to try and survive in the system

I forgive myself that I had not accepted and allowed myself to trust myself within writing down the points to forgive, and the points to take action on, and within this, to trust my ability to just 'do it now' and start, and within my starting point being here to act in a way that is best for all life, that I can trust my ability to get the things done, to 'stack the wins' in terms of accomplishing the things that I can see in my self honesty is best to do

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not realize that bringing forth points of realization every day is an essential aspect of me living my purpose, and this is where genuine pride comes from where I am able to be proud of my self and moving self and the world forward, because in my self-honesty I have my location point and as I do this to the best of my ability, it opens up new potential for all 

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to believe that 'thinking' about the points I have to do that the thinking is productive, when in reality the processing of the points, looking at it and taking it ONE POINT AT A TIME this is the actual resolution of the overwhelm in my mind

I forgive myself that I had not seen the obvious - that just like my breath is one breath at a time, seeing the next point to do, and focusing on the point, this is the way I deal with reality and work with reality

I forgive myself that I had not accepted and allowed myself to see and STOP my addiction to trying to do too many things at once, where I had tricked myself into believing that I am 'productive' when I focus on many tasks, getting high on the energy of the conflict 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to miss the obvious that as self-forgiveness is one letter at a time, one word at a time, this is the accumulation of moving reality forward when done in self honest self expression and as this - I am working with reality, integrating my expansion into greater responsibility and abilities 

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not realize that reality works one point at a time, there is a pace to reality, its not 'hyper quick' like the mind yet when done steadily it creates lasting change because the structure is integrated - much like when I develop a new skill, it takes time to integrate, yet once its here it then is part of me as who I am

I commit myself to develop the skills one point at a time, to stand as the integration of these skills, and as this stacks up I become a director within my reality and reality overall, so that the evidence is verifiable that I have indeed integrated this skill

I commit myself to show that if I feel resistance - self honesty is needed

I commit myself to enjoy the process of taking things one point at a time

I commit myself to whenever I'm overwhelmed, to remind myself to breathe, to acknowledge my capacity has been overloaded, and as I return to breath I can forgive and act in a way that keeps moving my life forward

I commit myself to show that one year of being present, bringing forth points of realization every day, sharing this process, taking responsibility point by point, that this is the guide for me to have the most effective year yet, exponentially more 'powerful' than any year I had previously because I have accumulated who I am into a force of nature that can be a node in the network of life and thus spread the principle of what is best for all through each action I do

I commit myself to walk the cutting edge of time point by point, one thing at a time

I commit myself to use my notebooks, my computer, my ways of recording words/data/information and as this - USING WHAT IS HERE to have a system by which I capture the necessary words, I then make time to process them and take action

I commit myself to use what is here as a living being here with my body and everything around me to be the best I can be, to share more effectively, to constantly make it the best day yet, and to measure my impact by the amount of other people I can support in taking on their full responsibility and living their fullest potential, as this is best for all and my living of this is integrated one point at a time

Enjoy

Day 78 - Life List

Day 78 - Life List

Today I made a youtube video you should watch it here: https://youtu.be/ZDcbCThDbo8?si=4hmv2bSQ6V3uHGfN

It was building on Day 10 - Face the Point

I call it the Life List

Its so simple

Its the real things to do that free you up to walk the cutting edge of time

And go FULL ON

Over years of walking this process I have noticed the tendency where my mind will 'bury' something

So this list is designed to help you face the point

And free yourself from your past limitation

And confront the system within you and thus free yourself up

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not realize the simplicity of making a list of all of the points I hide from, I avoid, I don't wanna look at, or don't know how to look at... and within this - the list becomes a life list because its in front of me, the clear path to live

I commit myself to live the SELF WILL to take the actions to resolve what is on this list

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to make this list more than it needs to be 'in my mind' 

I realize see and understand that as I knock out the things I have avoided, in conjunction with me walking my process, sharing, taking full responsibility, that my life list is there as a reminder that I can be life, walk the cutting edge of time, change rapidly and open up space for new opportunity to enter my life, because I am letting go of the old, and have the opportunity to be here and have life come through me as me 

I commit myself to use self-forgiveness as I look at my life list, and to have real time application to walk through and show myself my strength that I can do the things I have been 'putting off'. What a great way to strengthen myself

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not realize that my skill of refining my focus, as my intention as who I am can come through as signal, piercing through the noise, and as I am this signal taking the living actions that are best for all, resolving old uncompleted loops/cycles - that as this completion that I am creating, I thus anchor myself into and as reality as one who is here to create thus establishing self trust and thus amplifying my signal

I commit myself to enjoy the release of the old, to laugh about it, and as this give myself grace and realize the wisdom of "do it now" having the constant forward expansion as self here, one and equal as all

This is how we expand life and allow creation to change - to be best for all

Watch that video at the top

Then make your list and

enjoy

Day 77 - Environment

Day 77 - Environment

Some times my environment gets cluttered, my office, our kitchen, etc.

Especially having 2 little kids, full time running my business, forgetting to eat meals going full on

Having a stay at home wife who makes nearly everything at home

It all can accumulate and there is 'consequence' in the environment. Not in a 'bad' way or a 'good' way, but I see that my environment has had an influence on me, my clarity. Some times when things are dirty I notice myself go into a state of blame and subtle backchat.

I see how it can affect my clarity. And this is not the best relationship with my environment. Thus self-forgiveness.

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to base my clarity on my environment 

I forgive myself that I had not accepted and allowed myself to realize that my inner clarity comes from my walking of my process, my writing, my rebuilding of my vocabulary, my clarity within on who I am and what I need to do daily, regardless of my environment on the outside

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the environment can play a factor and there is a common sense equilibrium to hit where I can take small 1+1 accumulative steps to clean up my room, my home, and to practice the principle of prevention to not make extra problems

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to participate in blame toward my wife when I notice there is a mess in the house, instead of realizing that I can contribute and be a +1, no backchat or blame needed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take my wife for granted that she does the dishes 90% of the time, and to not realize the moments I can step in and help with it where it's practical and I can help

I forgive myself that I had not accepted and allowed myself to realize that my memories from childhood of my environment are still influencing me to this day, and within this I forgive myself that i have not accepted and allowed myself to pin point and place into words the exact memories of clutter, reaction to environment and to thus be able to purify these memories and create an automatic life-giving environment here

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let clutter accumulate in my home in certain areas and only to move myself when it gets so bad that it's an impediment in me moving/doing thing with a reasonable pace, and within this I forgive myself that I had not accepted and allowed myself to realize that perfection CAN look like having dishes in the sink, it doesn't mean everything is 'flawless' as I realize there is a space time reality to navigate and there are priorities more important than the environment YET its simple enough that as I walk this self forgiveness here real time I can see obviously there are moments in my day where I can walk past something, pick it up, move it forward, and stay in a state of constant progression thus having this ripple out into all of reality as Self-Responsibility in action

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to hyper fixate on organization and perfection, then also let clutter accumulate, playing the polarity game instead of realizing the best for all balance as the path of self-responsibility  to respect my environment both external and internal, and to stay in motion as when I am moving physically there is no room for my mind to run rampant, its a physical movement that is able to be evidence of how much I can do in a day

I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not see the obvious that certain areas like dishes, the kitchen, my bedroom, the laundry room, all of these are my wife's responsibility yet as I can see, and practice the principle of 'give as I would like to receive' I can make genuine progress here, free her up as well to be a better mom and support in our community, and thus I can be for giving and thus perpetuate the flywheel of effective life-giving that we are creating, and that looks like small actions daily when in my self-honesty I realize it can be done

I realize that my environment is a reflection of me, and as I change the outside it can support the change inside

I realize that my inner state will reflect in my environment - thus I have 2 ways I can always make progress to clear up myself, clearing the inner world and also cleaning up the outer world, in the little moments that normally I would neglect, I can use them to stack up the 'positive' accumulation of having a life-giving environment

I realize that a hyper fixation on organization is not needed

I realize that a neglect of objects and thus accumulation of clutter is also not needed

I commit myself to take daily actions where practical to help the environment move forward, to create space for the new and to honor my environment as I honor my inner and external reality

I commit myself to remind myself of my purpose - to change the system - is intertwined with having my own home in order, and the home being in order doesn't mean its 'flawless' rather the coordination of our family, all working together, all maintaining progress in our process and becoming the best we can be, this is the real meaning of keeping our house in order, and perfecting our environment

Now to go help Jess catch up on the dishes in between phone calls where I am out sharing/giving to people to help them actually start this process and change their lives and be agents of change in the world.

Day 76 - Skeleton Structure (Part 2)

Day 76 - Skeleton Structure Part 2

This is putting the 'meat' on the bones of the skeleton so to speak. Its creating life anew. Through words. Hey isn't there something about 'in the beginning was the word', and this is how all form came to be? (More about that in a future blog)

Picking up on where I left off - this is the skeleton structure (below) then underneath it I'm gonna copy/paste it again and write out 1 self-honest forgiveness statement and 1 self-honest commitment statement (as all the self-forgiveness should be). 

I am at daycare

I am in the family room watching the TV

I think 'where is my brother'?

I look in the other room

I feel anxious

I think 'I want to see my brother'

I feel scared

I think 'oh no I am alone'

I think 'I don't know where he is'

My stomach feels like a knot in it

I think 'what if he doesn't come back'

My temples feel flush 

I hold my breath

I think 'I want mom to be here'

I think 'what if mom never gets me'

My eyes start to water

I feel fear

I think 'please make this feeling stop'

I stay on the couch

I feel frozen

NOW here is the Self-Forgiveness

I am at daycare

    I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not understand that wherever I am, I can cultivate the sense of who I am, and thus being in any environment whether at home or daycare I can be ME FULLY

    I commit myself to be myself fully regardless of the environment I am in, and within this commit myself to live my life so effectively that we can evolve daycare into being a best for all solution where kids don't need to be dropped on in environments that aren't supportive to them

I am in the family room watching the TV

    I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not realize that watching TV had brain washed me into being a trance-induced zombie in my life

    I commit myself to take responsibility for the programming that was implanted into me through my TV watching - which I didn't know any better then at the time but I do know better now so I will use all my programming and convert it to what's best for all

I think 'where is my brother'?

    I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to look for my brother from a starting point of separation/concern/fear instead of just looking

    I commit myself to use looking instead of thinking, where looking is a practical real physical application of myself instead of a thought which induces a thought-frenzy runaway train within

I look in the other room

    I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the looking here now came from a fear-based thought, and thus in each moment now as an adult I can breathe, be here and catch the thoughts that are fear based, and instead just use looking and my day to day living to create the best relationships whether with my brother or with anyone

    I commit myself to catch my thoughts so when I take action from the starting point of a thought, to immediately recognize it, breathe, stabilize and continue to be here one and equal and direct myself in the best way I see in each moment

I feel anxious

    I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to participate in feeling anxious and not direct the anxiety in a way that was best -- (note to the reader, as a kid I didn't know any better, so I do not forgive myself for something unreasonable, rather this writing is to stand in the present moment, forgive the energetic reactions and now live in a new way that prevents future consequence)

I commit myself to breathe through anxiety, and to see where its coming from, and act in a way that is best for all regardless of the feeling of anxiety

I think 'I want to see my brother'

    I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not realize that as a kid my 'wanting' to see my brother was innocent, it was me looking for safety and security to ground myself, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to look outside myself for a sense of safety and security rather than my own breath and my own self-trust

    I commit myself to show that I have the real safety and security which is self trust in each moment, and the living awareness to stand in the essential positions in our world where I can direct outcomes so that way others don't need to walk this same point of looking to outside sources, where I can be a resource for others so they can see this within themselves that they can be their own authority, they can regulate themselves, we can all do this as equals through effective self education and effective living

I feel scared

    I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to react to feeling scared, and within this reaction to judge the sense of fear where I label it as the word 'scared'

    I commit myself to walk through any feelings of 'scared' and 'fear' that are left unprocessed from childhood so that I can stand up in this world fearless and able to direct any situation I find myself in, and thus I commit myself to have gratitude for this process to process my past, to see it in a new 'light' and to act in a way where future children do not have to experience unnecessary fear, and they have the tools and process by which to have a life of clarity and common sense

I think 'oh no I am alone'

    I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not realize that in that moment I was alone, I did still have myself and my abilities to move, and even though as a child I wasn't able to break out of this thought-pattern, now here as an adult I can learn from this and direct myself so even as being 'alone' within myself I am alone yet all-is-one so as I can change me, this supports the change for all which is the real purpose I am here to live

    I commit myself to realize that I am alone, yet all is one, so thus we are together alone able to live this in the best way instead of reacting to it

I think 'I don't know where he is'

    I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to think 'I don't know where he is' from a starting point of fear

    I commit myself to be ok with not knowing everything, yet as self-trust I can always direct myself and figure out any situation to create the best for all solutions to any problem

My stomach feels like a knot in it

    I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not realize that my stomach 'in a knot' sensation is my nervous system experiencing stress

    I commit myself to support myself to breathe during any moment of stress and to live in such a way where I can help convert the stressors of our planet into a life-giving system where distressing situations are prevented as much as possible, and we can learn through enjoyment and alternative ways instead of stress/trauma/limitations

I think 'what if he doesn't come back'

    I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to participate in the pattern of catastrophizing and making things a worst case scenario

    I commit myself to see each situation for what it is and within that as I observe the situation within myself realizing that I can define each relationship and point in my life in a way where it is a +1 accumulation of life - no matter what it is I can convert any point into a +1 for life if I approach it in awareness, with patience and tenacity

My temples feel flush 

    I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not realize that my physical body will give me signs that are interconnected physically, mentally and that I can use my body as a cross-reference to understand myself better

    I commit myself to use my body as a cross-reference, and to learn from each situation to become even more stable and effective in my walking of my process

I hold my breath

    I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to hold my breath 

    I commit myself to use my breath as the constant source of life in-flow and out-flow thus never being stagnant, always able to move and direct and create

I think 'I want mom to be here'

    I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to judge myself for wanting my mom to be there, as a child she was the primary source of comfort for me and thus in this situation I didn't have her there, and couldn't articulate myself so here and now I can let this go and act anew

    I commit myself to re-parent myself and to be the best parent I can be to see how I can raise my kids to be 100% effective confident co-creators of reality, and to act in a way where I can help change the entire world so all kids can be at 100% effective capacity

I think 'what if mom never gets me'

    I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to hold onto this fear of 'what if my mom never gets me' where in that moment I can see how that thought would be there but here and now I see how I can direct myself in any situation

    I commit myself to be present, to stop the 'runaway thought train' that turns everything into a catastrophe and to calibrate my mind, my body, my living and my relationships to create a role model family of what is possible so that more and more families can create supportive environmetns 24/7 for their kids, and to redefine adversity from something that legitimately harms/holds back a child, whether intentionally or unintentionally, to living adversity in the best way which is adding words to a child, where a child can prove their effectiveness, overcome limitations and develop strength without having to walk through consequences

My eyes start to water

    I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not realize that tears are a physical release for the body and this was my body attempting to support me to release the fear build up

    I commit myself to understand my body and how I can physically release stored up programming/experiences/trapped energy so that my body can be a pure vessel/temple for life to come through unadulterated/unfiltered

I feel fear

    I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to feel fear and react to it, instead of allowing it to pass through me and use it as a learning experience

    I commit myself to welcome the fears where I can thus process them, and to clearly understand for myself and for my kids and for all - that danger and fear are two different things - danger is something that actually has consequence, and needs to be avoided, which makes sense. Fear is a glitch that comes from separation from life and is a denial of self-trust and self-understanding, where fear creates neuroticism - and thus I commit myself to help the world understand this and over time to walk fear out of existence

I think 'please make this feeling stop'

    I forgive myself that I had not accepted and allowed myself to realize that self-forgiveness, breath and physical application is the ultimate way to 100% remove the feelings that hold us back

    I commit myself to educate the world on how the mind/feelings/emotions and limitations work, so that we can unlock our best expression as individuals and as humanity

I stay on the couch

    I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to associate the couch with comfort yet a fake comfort, a freezing and an abdication of movement

    I commit myself to in any moment where I feel stuck or like I am resonantly wanting to stay stuck/stay put, to breathe and assess what makes sense and to move - no thinking/overthinking needed just practical living and movement thus creating WAY more in my life and being able to prevent future consequence

I feel frozen

    I forgive myself that I had accepted and allowed myself to not realize that my nervous system went into 'freeze' mode, and as this freeze I had accepted and allowed the fear of the unknown, until here no further

    I commit myself to prove to myself I have no more fear of the unknown as I can trust myself and I trust that in each moment I can act in a way that is best for all, to assess consequence and determine the effectiveness of my actions, to create a better and better life for me, my family, my kids, our community and ultimately the world so that way we don't need to time loop on fear, we can just get to sharing and enjoying our 'share' of life here

Final step - now its on YOU the reader to do this

Pick a memory, use the previous day as an example of how to do it

And just write

It doesn't have to be 'perfect' rather its a 'muscle' you can build

really its your self-will/spark of life as a being coming through

And as you 'forgive' programs effectively, its a conversion of the energetic program which was stripping away your body/life force/being, and converting that energy BACK into substance, thus you have more power, more ability to create and thus together we have the will power and capacity to change our world.

So what are you waiting for? Just do it